Letting go
Have you ever seen the Style Network show “Clean House”? You should watch this show, really. Niecy Nash, who is a party all by herself, comes into people’s houses and strips them of clutter, accumulation, and “foolishness”. While doing that, she somehow — does she have a PhD in psychology, ya think? — draws out from people the reasons they are holding on to all the stuff.
Which brings me to people holding on to the stuff that causes discord in their marriage even as they are getting divorced. Oh, I don’t mean the “stuff” like abuse, alcohol, gambling and drugs. I mean the petty stuff that keeps the divorce from being harmonious. While I realize that if you got along you might not have to get divorced, nonetheless, once you decide to do so, you might consider whether letting go of hostilities might not save both of you time, emotional distress and even — dare I say it? — money.
There I go, cutting off my nose to spite my face. But really, folks. I tell people: You can put my child through college, or yours. If you fight over things that you need to let go, more of your money (”your” being a word here which means “his and hers”) will go to lawyers.
Now, if you want to give me more of your money, I guess that’s okay. But, if you can “let go” and get along as you divide the stuff, I recommend you do so. A Missouri divorce is a lot easier if you can let go of the argument and get down to brass tacks.